Dean Grose, mayor of the small southern California town of Los Alamitos, thought it was funny. It was an email of a watermelon patch superimposed on the lawn of the White House. In an incredible lapse of judgment, he forwarded the email to members of the community with a heading that read, "No Easter Egg hunt this year."
It's hard to believe that any politician, even one from a small town, could be so tone-deaf. Not at a time when everyone is so hypersensitive about race.
Predictably, the email found its way to the inboxes of people who took major umbrage and demanded an apology.
Keyanus Price, an African American community volunteer, was appalled.
She responded to the email: "Hey, that's not nice at all. Not all black people like watermelon... you should know better than that."
His alarm bells should have been going off. But Grose just dug himself in deeper: "The way things are today, you gotta laugh every now and then. I wanna see the coloring contests."
Price said Grose's response upset her more. "As soon as I saw his response; that put me over the top because it was no big deal to him," she said.
Only when dozens, and then hundreds, of angry calls came did Dean Grose understand what a mistake he made.
Mayor Grose issued a statement:
I am deeply embarrassed in receiving your email, and for any harm or hurt that it may have caused. It was poor judgement [sic] on my part and was never intended to be offensive to Ms. Price, your company or anyone in the African American Community. I have exchanged emails with Ms. Price in the past.
I can fully understand your concerns and comments. Please be advised that I have left a voice mail for Ms. Price and will also be sending her a separate email with my apology. You can be assured that I will not allow this to happen again. I in no way was representing the City of Los Alamitos, or my role as a council member in sending this out and it went via my private business email. That doesn't justify the fact that it was sent, however, we gratefully appreciate the contributions that your company makes to our community and I wish to publically apologize to anyone within the firm or organization that may have been offended.
I am truly sorry.
Dean Grose
Now then. What are we to make of this apology?
First, it is inadequate on three levels. First, the apology fails to specify just what Grose is apologizing for. Second, the apology dwells too much on intention and not enough on consequences. Third, the apology is way too conditional. Every time Grose talks about the harm or hurt that his actions "may have caused" or anyone that "may have been offended," he distances himself from taking personal responsibility. The issue is not whether hurt may have been caused or anyone may have been offended. The issue is that Grose's decision to forward a racist email was manifestly offensive.
I personally think in this case an apology via voice mail and email is cowardly. Although in Effective Apology I suggest that if someone offends by email, he or she can use email to apologize, in this case I think a visit, personal phone call (not a voice mail), or a traditional letter is the way to go.
The apology fails to offer restitution. This failure led to the demands for Grose to resign not just his role as mayor but also his role as City Council member.
On the plus side, the mayor did address the repetition dimension of apology by promising not to repeat the behavior.
A week after the incident, Dean Grose resigned sent a one-line letter of resignation from all his offices. He didn't show his face at the city council meeting that accepted his resignation.
Leave a comment